The fyrst Acte. The second Sceane. Hodge. Diccon. Hodge See so cham arayed with dablynge in the durt She that set me to ditchinge, ich wold she had the squrt Was neuer poore soule that such a life had ? Gogs bones thys vylthy glaye hase drest mee to bad Gods soule, see how this stuffe teares Iche were better to bee a Bearward and set to keepe Beares By the Masse here is a gasshe, a sharnefull hole in deade And one stytch teare furder, a man may thruste in his heade Diccon By my fathers soule Hodge, if I shulde now be sworne I can not chuse but say thy breech is foule be-torne But the next remedye in such acaseand hap Is to plaunche on a piece, as brode as thy cap. Hodge Gogs soule man, tis not yet two dayes fully ended Synce my dame Gurton (chem sure) these breches amended, But cham made such a drudge to trudge at euery neede Chwold rend it though it were stitched wyth sturdy pacthreede, Diccon Hoge, let thy breeches go, and speake and tell mee soone What deuill ayleth gammer gurton, & Tib her mayd to frowne, Hodge Tush man thart deceyued tys theyr dayly looke, They coure so ouer ye coles, theyr eyes be bleard with smooke, Diccon Nay by the masse, I perfectly perceiued as I came hether That eyther Tib & her dame hath ben by the eares together Or els as great a matter as thou shalt shortly see. Hodge Now iche beseeche our Lord they neuer better agree. Diccon By gogs soule there they syt as still as stones in the streite As though they had ben taken with fairies or els wt some il sprite Hodge Gogs hart, I durst haue layd my cap to a crowne Chwould lerne of some prancome as sone as ich came to town. Diccon Why Hodge art thou inspyred? or dedst thou therof here? Hodge Nay but ich saw such a wonder as ich saw nat ths vii. yere Tome Tannkards Cow (be gogs bones) she set me vp her saile And flynging about his halfe aker fysking with her taile, As thoughthere had ben in her ars a swarme of Bees, And chad not cryed tphrowh hoore shead lept out of his Lees. Diccon Why Hodg lies the connyng in Tom tankards cowes taile? Hodge Well ich chaue hard some say such tokens do not fayle, But canst yu not tell in faith Diccon, why she frownes or wher at Hath no man stolne her Ducks or Henes, or gelded gyb her Cat Diccon What deuyll can I tell man, I cold not haue one word They gaue no more hede to my talk then thou woldst to a lorde Hodge Iche can not styll but muse what meruaylous thinge it is Chyll in and know my selfe what matters are arnys. Diccon Then farewell hodge a while, synce thou doest inward hast, For I will into the good wyfe Chats, to feele how the ale dooth taste.