The nasal whine of power whips a new universe...wounds that we wrap
with theorems sharp as hail! -- Hart Crane, "Cape Hatteras"
One c: loud's ig: nition brands: a hand-pain:
ted blue vein: a qui: c:k Epi: gonic wish:
bone: dec: orates the shaft: of my 8" realistic:
c:O: c: K: which comes with its own
suc:tion c:up!
Inserted at the base beneath the test: ic: les: two small kiwi:
dip: ped in gau: zed rub: ber. After the Hydro: ponic kiss:
I ride my invi: sible man (sunk into the floorboards).
Dil: do:nic body surf breaks my ice cave into fragments.
Sic: k with the world: I call out to theCh:
Urning: haunting monk's moan: I spec: ialize in the wounded
zone: ec: ho-pulsing through all that dang: er(r:one)ous darkness:
erroneous erogenous bone:
As the solitary whale eye: speeds up through green depths of oc:
ean: emerges to witness that live: wire: slap: Light c:
racks the globe: dwarfs a c: lust: er of needy sky sc:
rapers.
Huddled and vying for attention from an oc: ean that pretends not to be l:one:ly:
Chur: ning
Chur: ning like a moaning monk through all that dangerous darkness.
(sometimes I pray this mostly happens by accident before sleep is someone talking to
you the TV mostly this originates in fear which is where the prayer hooks me like floss)
I later rode the un: comfortable mar: riage of per:ception &
sensation and con: ception.
Ink-stained dildo purple stuck-suctioned phony man
Flopping monster tongue against our shower wall: I'm elite: I sing
in the mirror: while I wash my feet pounding into pounding I smile
into sweet:
(It's A Dissociative High: Percept: ion forgets sen:sat:ion (regrets)
as if you were already dead: This memory fact sits somewhere
near my brain's hippo: campus quiet and intact pul: sing ultra-
violet amber: re: member:(please) re: member: (yes)re: member:
Let us cat: alogue our panic: ked con: sciousness!
Let us dis: guise our interio: rity with an appro: priately masc: uline co:
herence. Yes. Let's un:bur:
Den this geni: us: Sometimes
the beauty
Lives in your pause. My blurred life wrapped in slick orange gauze.
Now you're forever in my con: templation's séan:ce.
Jesus Mary and Asia.
Pale orange dys: phasia: a phantom pain
dressed up: as Prancing Mary in Malaysia.
Mathematics, my dear, is universal: the so-c:alled language of god. Re:
member nothing is c: re: ated nor des: troyed
outside the micro: cosm of perception. you may only add and subtract
using what is hidden and what remains un: seen. I begin in a dream:
I will spend my life: suturing lightning: a flash of ob:
jective per: spective: sublimates my scream.
Subtract desire: divide deception: working with product:
s:keptics for hire.
Always in bet: ween offered as my sutu: red life in trade's cream.
I'm afraid to dream of topo: logical disguises that last
only a short distance: they have no endurance: no perfect past:
Like trying to teach appropriate touching to your own mother.
(come up to the engine: and bring your dangerous flashlight.)
July 12, 2000: first attempt at last sexual en: counter. Is queer ce:
lib: acy so imp: ossible? How about beginning again: Yes: howbout
starting from your own tainted mouth? Celibacy Sell: I: Base: He?
I'm going about my life as if it's not my life: (The truth is I'm nervous at this: I don't
want to tell you anything. I will spend my life
suturing lightning.)
Yeah: Yeah: get over it kid: Trick is to beetle up
with somboddy: no:wad:im:sayin? Rub your face on orange velour:
S: No: w accident e. e. met pound: (privileged whore) we seek out what's
sugarest: what's divagalore. I've emerged on a swell:
Let's ride it straight: to Hell's too easy: let's get sleazy:
Dil: do breaks my anus: (de: fec: ation:re-rips the fiss: ure:)
I've prepared the hardwood floor for the fucking. Stuck-suctioned the dildo
in the center of the living room: I squeeze a palm full of lubricant: my
anus tenses as I finger it warm: hard as an eraser head: wide as a golf ball
Slips in like a baby's foot coming through the birth canal:
electric eel forcing itself into the throat of a swan: pressing against my
plum gland: you know the saying: too many cooks? At night: alone: I marry
my books.
If I begin as a joke: then meaning the yoke: I'll never choke:
O no she didn't: (bitch is reeling: vulg: (hil): arity
pre-washed the body's bloody ceiling: mothers invent our fever's
fermented status: Now: Now will always: keep happening:
I will spend my life suturing lightning.)
Let us reverse this choral-jaded trend
That perversed our moral mind to mend
Our selves like wax to sordid end.
Billy says: Can I have my crack and mania back? Billy says:
One night: I got so desperate: I found myself jaw grinding under the covers:
Sucking the dildo. That's Fetusesque! Lace: rate your lovers
With your mouth's secret crest.
(I'll throw you a bitchily repulsive bone: on the outside I'm all clone:
faux military of the boring sort so drag my ass into queer court.)
"(7:00) the bed that never supersedes the womb, a futuresque casket."HIV,
Mon Amour, Tory Dent, The Sheep Meadow Press, Page 49. Winner of the 1999
James Laughlin Award of The Academy of American Poets. Judges for 1999:
Lynn Emanuel, Yusef Komunyakaa, Marilyn Nelson.
You better believe this is a historical document:you better believe. (Sisters)
You best be: lieve. (Brothers)
I survived this ambivalent May: a nimbus cloud con:geals
within us: he writes it in red pen in HIV, MonAmour: then
c:rosses out HIV and c:ircles the word DEATH above it. (Also in Red)
Billy says: Billy says: Billy says: Billlysaysbillysays:!
I'm writing this on e: lation's admission: less permission more a plea:
Let us drift like a Shakespearian dirge: let us binge and never purge.
I take a break from "Refuse The Music" to jot this down: everyone drown
On the sign of Brown: then rise like porn: on the sign of Orange.
Alright then: are they really demi-gods or simply demi-men: And should I
run with this voice: or this voice? As if Plath had a choice
To avoid the oven: O Sylvia: what else can I say? You make me
want to pray. Chuck D style: by any means spastic: O dear she
thinks she's getting drastic:
I ain't c: Lear yet: BUT I THINK IT MIGHT BE SAWED OFF:
AND MADE OF SAGE: LILAC:
He will win all including this morning's prize:
two azure eyes
parade with a contempt memory
down
the aisle of
hows
and
whys.
Rapt memory free
your dark embrace
with the simple shadow
our sun makes of me.
I be: come: not same. I be: shame. I be: cause: not came.
at what point did you begin to hear the buzz?
the words dissolve but what remains?
the egg the ball the rain
I am chalk (erased?)
left in a dust-layer on the body eraser - wipe the life board clean!
Chalk friend wants to write again: (all ready?) future words (to dissolve when the need
be) yet to be seen seated at this table set by me.
Thunder derides danger: I am the gauzed one marked: derange: d: anger
Thunder deranged my anger: then the lightning stuck a bolt through
the window: Epi: gonic: Hydro: ponic:.
Sig: natured a blue wish: bone scar on my dil: do as I rode the in: visible
man into the Bing: hamton floorboards. Two pill: ows for each
knee: I thought the shadow was entering me: with Scintilla Vitae igniting my sea.
If you were to walk in now: open the door an see me: stuck in 1995:
--I'm Bouncing Slowly in storm's dim light from the Purple Green Sky.
Riding my in: visible man in: : riding riding the floor boar: ds:
into my man--
Walk in and see me bouncing in front of my TV: I would look ridiculous: path
e: tic
Absurd: alone: almost (yes: almost) enti: rely
hu: (bristic!) man.